Island for One,.... Please

and the day rolled on, over along the hills,
out through the dusty street
towards something bigger than her or i
or anyone before us,
the day rolled on
the doors were all closed for us, 
it was the end of summer
and then i could see the icicles forming
icecaps over mainland
as the drunks crept into the bar
hunched over and dragging their sad feet
it was glorious to watch
and enormous to be inside 
of the four walls
with the beast half covered and foaming at the mouth
mad dogs roaming the pool table
fighting
and 
dying
all at the same time.
i saw no use in it as i slurped at my beer
and watched the perverts
the short skirts; legs opening wide atop stools
and every mans eyes were bigger
than his gut
bigger than him
or anything that he'll ever be
i felt the level lower 
glass clinking
heads hitting mahogany bar
bones crushing
bone machines running
throughout them
as more and more stumbled through the doors
until finally the bar was flowing wildly with madness
and laughter
they were all awake now
roaming the bar back and forth
slurping and sucking at their beers
their cheap scotch
and whiskey drinking fiends
i stepped out to smoke in the fading sun
and a chill blew through me
the bouncer was in the recessed doorway of the offices next door
and my nostrils caught the hint of herb 
he leaned out
to take a survey of his surroundings
and motioned me over
handed me the piece
and i inhaled as deep as i could let myself
i held it there for a moment
and he smiled at me
that knowing smile that i'm all too familiar with
when a girl likes me and smiles
when my father drops some knowledge
and i know what he means
and he smiles
when i follow the patterns in life
and smile
we all smiled then
and i stood in the glory of that moment
to be alive
and know that 
i meant nothing on this earth
and no one would ever remember me
and i could never be something important
and i could never love someone completely
and i could never be a great writer
or a great person
because i was human
and that alone
was a fault
but i felt good knowing these things
because it set me free to play
in this playground
it was great to watch
and astonishing to be apart of
i smiled inside
but kept the cold face
around these bastards
one sign of kindness
and they'll drag you out back
beat you to shit
and steal your shoes
your wallet
and the shirt off your back.