Who the Fuck Wants This Guy?

it's true
i drive a shitty car
and
drink like a fish
to write like a fiend
i do it for the words
not for me
i do it for the vision
the drive to put ink to paper
it's so much more important
than anything i have right now
smoke cigarettes
am not very good looking
prone to self loathing
and judgmental
cynical at times
arrogant
confident
and i depreciate in value
every nanosecond
i get it
who wants a guy
who looks like a total wreck
from the outside
who doesn't look responsible
dwindling his life away.
little do you know though
dear readers
that even though i write
about all this sad sappy crap
i am a man
who knows what he wants
when he wants it
and how he wants it
and either get in the car
or i'm half way down the road
and you're in the dust
i believe in one maxim of life,
"don't be a moron, but don't hold anything back that should be done, said, or expressed"

nobody is ever ready for that
so they think i'm some kind of weird
alcoholic
deranged
imbecile.....
that's okay
i know
at the end of the day
that my friends come first
i'm willing to give more than myself
for a piece of heart
to place in my chest
and that's the sad part of it all
the lonely stay alone
and the assholes
get all the fun
the good guy never wins
but that doesn't mean i'll change
my view on life
i don't ever expect anyone
to fully understand
or accept me
but i'll accept them
for all their faults
bad breath
ugly toes
ear infections
mucus in the nose
dirty hair
it's all part of loving
a person
total
utter
enjoyment
of their flaws
you know those bad guys?
who always end up with the girls?
yeah
well...
fuck those bastards