the face plastic
smile cheap like the wine
hips slender down into bones
tits hanging out
waiting for someone
conversations were no longer fun
the game was lost in
tramps
she hid herself well
the days had drawn in on themselves
and we were left with hard nights
or at least he was
she never had to be anything
other than sweet
and that was good enough for those
other boys
but not well off
for him.
he turned his head
away
away from everything
that would only frustrate him
demolish him
and keep him back
she was too heavy to carry
so he left her out there
to ruin someone else's life
or to be ruined herself
by someone who
she wouldn't mind be ruined by.
it's better to travel alone
read alone
dance and drink
write and breath
sucker punched the old dying boy
who wasn't well off enough
loving life enough
dumb enough
to be enough.
enough?
who want's to be enough
when you can be
so
much
more
than
that
and who
is
she
to
validate
him?
drawn on silver moon
by solitude.

The Pogues (get on up to get back down again)

I met my love by the gas works wall
Dreamed a dream by the old canal
Kissed a girl by the factory wall
Dirty old town
Dirty old town

Clouds a drifting across the moon
Cats a prowling on their beat
Spring's a girl in the street at night
Dirty old town
Dirty old town

Heard a siren from the docks
Saw a train set the night on fire
Smelled the spring on the smoky wind
Dirty old town
Dirty old town

I'm going to make me a good sharp axe
Shining steel tempered in the fire
Will chop you down like an old dead tree
Dirty old town
Dirty old town

I met my love by the gas works wall
Dreamed a dream by the old canal
Kissed a girl by the factory wall
Dirty old town
Dirty old town
Dirty old town
Dirty old town

Sweater Puppies

they circled me, like vultures smelling dying body. these Orange County women were vultures, at least from what i could tell. they didn't so much look trashy, as they did look cheesy and rotten. ideal mates for douche bag unoriginal macho testosterone fueled males. i cringed as they got near me, their perfume tickled my nose and i wanted to sneeze and cough all at once. fake tan, blond hair, blue eyes, clothing that represented some far transplant from somewhere upstate New York, or perhaps the Jersey Shore. these were not women, they were Barbie dolls, and if this is what women were suppose to look like, then this country has gotten the images so ass backwards that we might as well start drinking the kool aide and stop asking for anything more. it was not only the older cougar roaming women who bore this wretched look, i could see the little cubs in training already, the young 20 something girls with surgically implanted smiles sucking on their iced coffee yammering on about themselves in a positive light.  not offering an opinion about anything, agreeing with anyone who would validate their severe lack of personality and hopelessly looking for that male who would provide them with "security".

the common thread between these women, and the one i've been noticing for sometime now, is their intent on showing off their breast (or as i like to call them "sweater puppies").  how far have we come as humans? does the size of your breast directly coincide with your intelligence? why don't you leave just a little bit to the imagination? do you have to show almost all of them? the more you show the more attention right? do you really want all that attention if you're just going to whine about how men won't see beyond your body and be gentlemen like? i get it, maybe you like dirty bastards like that who make you feel bad? or maybe you just like  dressing with low cut shirts? perhaps, women don't even know they're doing this, and are clueless to the result that they have on the male mind? i will admit, i love me some fine  breast, but when a girl just puts them out there like that, on display, it makes me want to not even approach them. i've already seen it, there's no mystery left. and if you're the kind of girl that feels the need to fill that empty void inside of you by doing so, and along with it being obedient like, then you've stop  being human and have become a piece of work. you're just something they trot around like a damn fine mare, the rabbit at the greyhound, or the dogs at the dog show. humans have thoughts, ideas, imagination, integrity and values.  

you have none of those

but your're pretty and have big tits.

why do i want to talk to you again?

a complete

day.

as people
no matter where we go
when we go
how we go
we have a brain
capable of memory
capable of emotions
and capable of lots and lots of things
given the opportunity to do this again
i wouldn't of changed a thing
if a beautiful girl like you
is kind enough to kiss a man like me
then it's my duty to kiss you right back
and be good to you
as you've been good to me
no goodbye
you have business
and you are strong
you move forward
as everyone in this world
is strung along
believe in yourself
you make shit happen
you are
above else
capable of everything
you're in my heart
whether you like it or not
your smile
your touch
your snuggle
your warm naked body next to me
as the sun comes in through your blinds
and shines down on your sexy body
and
your beautiful laugh
the smile you give my face
this is not an end
don't think of it like that
this is
opportunities
and i believe
that when you come back
full fledged
and deep
i'll be waiting at the gates
with flowers for you
don't fret baby girl
we've got something good

oh boy,
oh gosh,
oh golly oh my,
how great it is
to stand
beside
the death trap
and be able to look down
into their and laugh
dance
and not need to pray
not need to hope
not need to place faith
devotion
into any falseness.
to be able to smile
and know
damn well know
about everything.
and ask those questions
about everything.
oh my
oh may.

Karen was a good woman, at least from what i knew. i'd roll into her studio apartment ready for almost anything. i came over to cook her dinner one night. i bought some nice fish, she deserved it. i'd never drop the money on some good fish unless the girl was well worth the cause. a fit to the means, she fit the means and everywhere in between. i commenced the cooking. my roommate had acquired a mexican wrestling mask somehow and i stowed it away in my backpack for future gimmicks and such. i figured this would be a great time to break it out. as i started cooking dinner she was folding laundry. she had a very kind face, always smiling, a pronounce chin and silky black hair. her lips always tasted like sweet rum and the times we kissed were like kings bathing themselves in pure cider. it was sweet. as she was folding laundry i explained how our sex had become somewhat mundane, but in a very practical, logical way. she peered at me with suspicious eyes wondering where this was going. i told her to close her eyes and turn around. she did. i said i wanted to try something new, something innovative that would bring a little suspension to what we had. she obliged. she had her hands over her eyes, just how i like it, and said to me that she hoped i wasn't wearing a tube sock on my cock. i laughed and told her to turn around. i had put the wrestling mask on and played it to the fullest. she didn't know how to take it once she took those small hands away from her big eyes. she laughed out loud and i played it cool, just like i was suppose to. we both took the joke in and kissed each other sweetly. i melted inside, but hid it well. i finished the dinner and we both ate. she cleared her plate away and shoved the food in her mouth. karen ate with passion, with small bits of grace, she had worth and that above all meant something to me. i thought of her as the black stone in the large cave full of diamonds, the stone standing out above the rest. i sat and appreciated the meal as she rubbed against me. love was thick in the air and i felt it thick in my lungs. the ice cubes danced in my cup as she refilled me. this was the life. i'd come in and she'd take my hat and coat, as well as offer me a drink. this was a true woman in the finest essence of the word. no other woman had ever done that for me. take my coat, offer me a drink (water at the very least) she was attentive and self confident. i felt warmness towards her, unlike anyone before.

as we kissed i made small smooching sounds, she enjoyed that, it was like painting over old, cracked surface. brought newness to mundanes. we started and it was very sweet. it was so sweet and solid that my body wanted to cum before i was ready. i resisted and told her to slow down a bit, it was too much for me at this time. she slowed down and be brought together a rhythm that i hadn't experienced with anyone else. my brain coincided with this and we were all on the same page. i matched my breathing with hers. it was not pornographic sex in the essence that i was trying to rip her in half or trying to be someone i was not. it was sex in the sense of two people laying in bed together connecting. the walls melted as the ceiling melted and the earth cried out as the blankets emulsified. i laid there stunned and full of joy never felt before with another body. i felt soft and wussy like, but enjoyed the experience nonetheless. i pulled out when ready and motioned to cum on her face, she paused and told me that she had never let anyone do this to her before, but that our attachment to each other was so strong that she was willing to let me do so.

she said she couldn't go on like this. life was crazy.
this is the way we were meant to live.
in madness..